by Tom Blitzenbaum
One thing you can count on with my eldest offspring Tom Mk2, is that a negative prompt directed his way can usually result in the exact opposite action. He’s a bit like Leonardo the AI artist in that way. So instead of staying put at IBeM HQ as I asked, he and his wingman were airborne when the rogue packout drone nailed me with a 50 cal bullet to the chest. Thank Yah for obstinate offspring.
You may have heard of his wingman, the legendary Tim Krooze of the Short Gun movies fame.
But I’ll let Gomer and Goober and their new-fangled AKV software at G&G 2126 take over the narrative for this one, since the last thing I remember about that day, I was peaking out from under a massive mound of Kaya’s fur. After that, it was “fade to black”.
So take it away boys.
All-Knowing Voice Software @2126 Provided Courtesy of the Dewberry RFD Historical Society
“Hey Shitsenbaum! You up here? What’s all this about a mine explosion?”
“Yeah, I copy Short Gun! I was out of range, on my way for a little trist in Helena when we got the word that somebody nuked the joint. So you know as much as we do and it ain’t much. Hey did you get the new carbon fiber blocks I sent you for reaching the rudder pedals?”
“Negative, Caveman. When are you going to get a shave and a haircut and trade that shiny mutt of yours in for a real thoroughbred Mustang?”
“Aw, man. Short Gun I wish you hadn’t said that.”
Highway to the Stranger Zone
Tom Mk2 was mashed back into the seat as the outraged Ryan AI folded his props back and lit off the afterburners. He wasn’t sure what or how his own son, GTO (Gary Thomas Oliver) Blitzenbaum had done to the Ryan airframe lately. But getting the latest upgrades and mods was a benefit of being the father of the uber kid who is the brains behind GTO Engineering.
Tim Krooze, “Short Gun” in his restored P51 Mustang “Little Doll” was a speck at 15,000 feet at one moment and about to get his red tail rudder chewed off the next, as Ryan Sta killed his afterburners, dropping in spinner-close on the six of the Little Doll Mustang. Short Gun was hardly relieved at the site of 8 scimitar-looking blades showing their teeth, knowing as he did that they were attached to a legendary GTO 12-cylinder-turbocharged Merlin engine, all unfolding with 4,600 RPM and 86 inches of manifold pressure. Had it been a real dogfight Short Gun would have been dog meat and he knew it.
“Alright, already Caveman! You bite that rudder you bought it, Stretch!”
“Hey, it wasn’t me Short Gun. I was just along for the ride.” laughed Tom.
“Well then, Ryan-san, I’m impressed. But let’s be fair here, my Little Doll is a restoration, pure WW2 tech. So we need a handicap to be fair against all that 2126 stuff GTO and the gang bolted on.”
“You asked for it Tim!” responded the plane’s AI, who by now was so integrated in the airframe processes that Ryan the airplane and Ryan the AI were often referred to collectively by the flyboy crowd as Ryan-san.
“Reconfiguring to authentic WW2 Rolls Ryce Sterling engine power…now”
Ryan-san rolled out and dove for the hills with his wingman latching on close behind. A rollicking session of evenly matched mock dogfighting had them back over the Wyoming HQ of IBeM before they knew it. Tom Mk2 was doing a hot dogging inverted pass when Tim, Short Gun Krooze flew up from beneath for some bubble-to-bubble wingman face time.
“So you going to buy this baby off me or what Stretch?”
“Holy shit Tim. Check out below! Belay that! Get on my wing to engage!”
As Krooze rolled out he could see the target Caveman was diving down on. Ryan-san was engaging with his eight 50 cals from the wings and a laser cannon from the spinner. They were diving in just ahead to Short Gun’s right, all of the plane’s blistering .50 cal shots pounding into a huge black freight drone with the IBeM logo on top. The drone had apparently gone rogue as it was deploying its anti-piracy defense systems, firing its auto high cal stuff relentlessly at something on the ground below in a small cell tower clearing.
Short Gun’s own Little Doll added her eight 50s to the chaos as they blew by at 550 mph. He zoned in on the drone’s gun arms, while Caveman’s spinner laser carved away one propellor after another. Krooze the actor had taken some flak from his pacifist Jollywood colleagues about arming his restored warbird, but now Short Gun the Northwest Air Guard reserve pilot was glad he did.
The big carbon black drone plowed in after performing some impressive gyroscopic tantrums. Its hydrogen fuel cells and remaining live ammo exploded magnificently about 100 yards into the woods, not far from the cell tower where it had been turning the soil with its automatic weapons assault. Caveman and Short Gun winged around to recon the site as the smoke cleared.
“Looks like the drone took out a big wolf down there Caveman.”
“That’s Kaya, Wei Sung’s custom-cloned hybrid Short Gun!”, then I put out the role call on empathic broadband, “Wei Sung? Pops? Crazyhorse? Anybody down there?”
Not a peep from man, woman, sexbot, or dog, Caveman and Short Gun were silent as they headed for the IBeM HQ airstrip.
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